Top ??

Yes I use myspace and facebook, but the Top Friends feature on there seems incomplete as not all of my dearest friends are not on there. So here is my homage to my top however many come to mind tonight.

1) EAR - I know you're swamped traveling the country hunting down the perfect program for your residency, but you will find it. You will survive residency. You will remain my best of friend for all of time.

2) The Original KDM - We've always had some sort of strange intergenerational sibling bond that I'm quite fond of. Even much more so now that I have matured a bit. I mean you still have and will continue to have nearly 14 years on me, but I won't hold that against you for too much longer.

3) Penland Roomie - We have completely lost contact and that saddens me. You were the only one of my friends during the time I was coming out at Big Baptist U that didn't change one single part of our dynamic. Maybe it's because we were forced to live with each other that we couldn't let it get weird, but I remember the good times and hope you are doing well.

4) Re - We survived working in the bomb shelter, chihuahua like managers, Dr. Evil bald managers, and the transition into an entirely new city for me and possibly for you soon as well. I hope our friendship continues to grow.

5) Current Roomie - I still don't like your boyfriend, I think you could do SO much better, but that's not my place. I miss having you at home and just chilling and doing stuff together. We didn't spend nearly enough time outdoors this summer.

6) Mal - I think you might find yourself surprised to find yourself on this list, but you shouldn't. You were the first person I knew I could trust with my deepest of worries, for that I shall forever be grateful.

7) Matt - Who knew that 5 years could make you realize you could become friends with someone you had figured you'd always be like oil and water around. Thank you for trusting me with some of your secrets and concerns. I never want to tell you how to do anything in your life, but I know it's always nice to get someone's opinion and I'm glad you at least ask for mine.

8) Mer - Wow... I feel like there is so much I want to share with you right now, but I just can't bring myself to add anything else to your plate at the moment. Good news is that it can wait awhile and we'll have plenty of time to discuss amongst ourselves then.

9) Original S&P - I know you probably will never read this, but I really need to thank you for filling a gap that I guess I so desperately needed, but was so unaware was there. You will always be my Austin Momma.

10) Brother - Thank you for coming to see me in the hospital. I think that was the first time we ever sat down and simply talked as adults. Glad to see you turned out alright ;-)

For now this is it, I'm actually struck by some of those that came to mind, but where I am right now these are the most important people I have or have had in my life and I just needed to let them know.

People, People Who Need People

People are essentially the same everywhere. Granted I'm limiting the context of this discussion to Americans, but really we are. Over the weekend I hung out with my friend from undergrad who's now at law school at UT. We had lunch, talked about life, got caught up, walked around the lake, and then we went to a party mostly of law students. The reason this all hit me was because of the conversations my friend and I had about people in our lives and what all is going on. I was sitting on the porch, sipping on my tonic and lime and was hit with the realization as another law student showed up dressed as Quail Man from the cartoon Doug, people really are the same everywhere. Every group has the annoying guy that gets drunk and loud. The couple that must be attached at the hip via Velcro. The shy nice guy that really wants to get the nerves to ask out the girl he's been attracted to the past 3 years of school together. The amateur expert that, although has no actual experience in the topic of discussion is still going to insist that her limited world view is a completely more logical argument that those that are learned in said areas of study or occupation. The list goes on.

Why this strikes me so right now is I'm really starting to like the boy from choir. He's adorable, sweet, has such a compassionate heart, and I shall end here for the list just continues to grow and I could crash the server if I expounded on all the things that make him wonderful. He's the perfect guy for me, but how am I for him? Normally at this point I would do something completely idiotic to sabotage any chance of a true relationship forming, but not this time. We shall continue to grow as friends and I will create no plan of contingency for what if he does or doesn't like me that way. We have plenty in common to become true friends and I hold those very close to my heart as I don't let many inside of the walls. My question for those of you who were at parties this weekend, socializing with all sorts of new people...I've read how you've "made new friends"...how is that possible in such a short amount of time? I won't call someone my friend until we've made each other happy and sad, cry from pain and cry from being curled up in the fetal position on the floor laughing together, hopped in the car and just drove somewhere to have some fun, shared a meal and a little part of ourselves that we guard so very closely. I guess this means while people can behave so similarly at times, we also need those who have those differences that we admire.

Can it really be called work?

I think I'm actually in some sort of indentured servitude right now. I have no desk, they gave it, my extension and account set to the guy who took them over when they didn't know how long I'd be out. So for the next two weeks until the new quarter starts I'm hunting for new accounts. I live in a land of Excel and Hoover's. They actually let me talk to customers today since we aren't making our number for the month... Here I am to save the day! You can call me Underdog.

Changes

So tomorrow it will be a full month since I have been to work. I've been sick. Spent a week in the hospital, but I'm better now. Just waiting on the doctor to say it's ok and I'll be heading back to the daily grind, but not without making some changes in my habits. I've lost about 10 lbs. since getting ill, but the good news is that I needed it and I've been doing it the right way. I cut out eating out. I treated myself to PF Chang's one night and to a burger another night. I think only eating out twice in a month is progress. I was wasting so much money.

I'm going a little stir crazy so I'm also looking forward to when I can get active again. Doc said it probably won't be for another 2-3 weeks, but I can wait. I found a great yoga studio that's in this part of town finally. My gym membership is still active and I think I'll stay there since I don't want to see my co-workers at the facilities there all the time, I spend enough time at the office already. (you know when I'm actually working)

My house is cleaner than it's ever been in my entire life and it has stayed that way... it's wonderful. My mother will not believe it is me typing this, but I suddenly care about a clean house. I think it's because the state of my house is something I can control. I've felt like I haven't been the one in control of my life since getting sick. So there's the update. I'm not sure if anyone reads this, but my therapist says I need to journal and this seems like one of those outlets I have to get things off my chest. I've always lived by the motto that everything happens for a reason. It's true... I'll get past this and will hopefully be a better stronger person from it all.

stubble yes, shaggy no

Nate Berkus needs to shave! At least by the end of the show it looks like his luggage had arrived and he was nice and semi-shorn for the big reveal. Oprah, be a friend, tell a gay boy when he's looking rough. I still heart you Nate, but don't hide that wonderful jaw line under a shaggy mess.

What will Ted's husband think of this?

So yes I watched the finale, but that was it... Favorite moment that shall remain a classic in my mind. Ted Allen from Queer Eye saying to Dale the gay boy from Chi-town, "Dale you are one decadent boy."

Bow-Chik-a-Waou-Waou

And isn't that pic of Dale just too cute, the coy smile as he lovingly prepares a fresh meal for you to get your strength back after a wild of passionate horizontal mambo...HEY a guy can dream ok!

Sick & Twisted? Yes please!

One year for my birthday while I was still up in Waco for school, I took a weekend trip down to Austin to hang out with some friends I had made through a now non-existent, but really cool chat website wbs. We did dinner and the bars the first night. On the second night I was taken on my first trip to the Alamo Drafthouse to see Spike & Mike's Sick and Twisted Festival of Animation. One of my favorite films from that night was Rejected by Don Hertzfeldt.

Rejected by Don Hertzfeldt

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I just ran across this gem and decided I should share it with others. This past year there was one particularly disturbing film called Chirpy, if anyone knows where this is posted online please let me know...I need to disturb some of my friends that didn't attend with me this past year. It usually returns every year around my birthday, if you're in Austin in January join us!