Monday, May 14, 2007

Fear and Loathing

Why am I having such difficulties making new friends in this town. Probably because I'm afraid, I always have been a very shy person. I'm afraid of two things.

#1-I'm at a different point in my life and a lot of the old friends I used to have here don't necessarily fit into my latest plan for my life.

#2-I don't think people will like me, so to avoid rejection I don't put myself out there.

I've always been the type of person to have a close group of 5-10 people in my life that I call my friends. Growing up it was the kids at church who formed this group. High school I had choir and classmates. At Baylor I had BIC and a few of the activities I was in, but mostly it was the BICers. At work in Waco I originally had co-workers, but as I became a manager there I had to end some relationships to protect my job and theirs.

I haven't surounded myself with people I really trust in awhile and that's what's really starting to bother me. With Nana getting hurt I was forced to think... If I became sick or in an accident, who would show up to comfort me? I realize whatever differences I might have with my family that they would all be there. Out of all of those people I knew growing up through working now who would show up? I have my list of those that I know for sure would be there if it was at all possible and it's good to know deep down they are there for me, but my immediate concern is for here and now... in Austin, who are my friends? There are some I know for sure and others that are growing on me, I'm slow to trust people nowadays.

I probably should stop spending every weekend I can at home alone doing nothing and get out there...it's just kinda scary. Everything happens for a reason, but if you don't go do something nothing happens and that's bad...real bad. So I shall go out with new people from work and make more of the friendships I have started in this new job. I'm going to give some of the people from Austin I knew before the benefit of the doubt knowing we can form a new deeper type of friendship than the one we had when I was still living in Waco. I'll be a happier person overall. I'm looking forward to that.

Wednesday, May 2, 2007

What the hell happened to...

The Honey Nut Cheerios Bee? Somewhere in the last 10 years he's become an anorexic thug with no fashion sense and a couple of strange friends. Now the friends I don't mind, it always bothered me he didn't seem to have any bee friends around, he was always with people telling us to stay healthy with that multi grain goodness. In his older commercials he looked like this:
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See he looks healthy and happy. Unlike the new guy:
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Look at him, his antenna are all perky and have shiny new balls on them and he's all digitized...seeing him all different just makes me feel older than I want to feel.

Tuesday, May 1, 2007

Trip to Houston

I have to head to Houston this weekend. I got a call from my sister just before 10 PM to tell me that my grandmother, who is in Texas visiting from North Carolina slipped at the restaurant she and my mom were eating at and broke her hip and shoulder. She's now in the same hospital I was born at waiting for surgery on Thursday morning to repair or replace her hip.

First thing is that I'm not surprised something like this happened at the restaurant there were at, but it's one of those moments where it happened to some you know and it makes you feel even worse. They were at a Texas Roadhouse. It's a good place for a steak, but anyone who is slightly OCD should avoid it all costs for their sanity. The reason for that is that they give you a large bucket of peanuts and as you eat them you drop the shells on the floor. Said shells pile up all day long and never get swept up. Add that to the fact there is a step up from floor piled with peanut shells to the booths and disaster was destined, but why did he have to be my 88 year old grandmother.

Brother who lives in San Antonio also got Friday off so the entire family will be in the the same metropolitan area for 3 whole days. The only thing that could top off the entire circus would be if my mother's sister flew in from North Carolina. This is the same aunt I once sold her something, warned it might not work the way she was expecting it to, and then returned it. Her excuse? "God was telling her they didn't need it." I wish I could consult the almighty on my purchases as well, I might have avoided my fashion experiments that failed miserably.

I must say that I'm very happy my manager had no problem asking and his manager had no problem approving the time off. I know other people who's manager won't let her off for her daughter's graduation from law school. She's a support rep that sits right behind me. That means she sells accessory items to what I sell so I don't have to have all that crap memorized. We'll call her the Matchmaker as she's tried to setup Roomie and is now working on getting me a man. We'll have to see how that goes. If you want to know about what's going on in the other half of our floor she's the woman to go to...all of the gossip. I usually try to stay ahead of everyone else so she's a good person to know.

Time to finish up Idol, drink some tea, and get some sleep. Still fighting this head cold thing I picked up from Roomie.

Be good!